Condescending feedback says more about the speaker than the listener. It is almost invariably about their own insecurity. This is true is almost all fields of endeavor, not just programming.
Just a few examples of my own:
Insecure bridge player: The queen of spades was a stupid play. What’s wrong with you?
Excellent bridge player: The queen of spades would have been a great play against a 4/2 split. But since you had a 3/3 split, what do you think would have happened if you had played the ace instead?
Insecure public speaker: You look like an idiot playing with your hands like that.
Excellent public speaker: You talked about a lot of cool things. I bet I would have been even more interested if I wasn’t distracted so much by your hand gestures.
Insecure parent: If you can’t keep that baby quiet, you should just stay at home!
Excellent parent: Here’s something that has really worked well for me when my kids cried in public…
Insecure programmer: How lame. I can’t believe you .
Excellent programmer: I see that works. I have found a few ways to make it work even better.
Let me know what you think.